Making choices has to be one of the most complicated things for me right now. Each and every decision comes with its own repercussions, sometimes good and sometimes bad. So, I find myself ever reflecting on my summer, my life, and the choices I have been making as of late.
It doesn't help either when different people give you polar opposite advice about the same situation, creating an even wider gap between the sides of black and white. So I stay in the gray, perhaps out of fear of making the wrong decision, or perhaps because when I'm in the middle, at least I still have places to go, and room to change my mind.
Sometimes the gray isn't necessarily the best place to be, though. This middle zone can be detrimental if one resides there too long, for it dulls one's capability of making firm decisions, and blurs the lines between black and white, wrong and right.
Everyone has their own opinion about the situations life throws us into, and I have begun to figure out that my own opinion should be the only one that matters. I need to stand firm and take that leap out of the middle zone, the comfort zone, the place where I don't have to think too hard or make the tough calls. I need to pick a side, black or white, and stop living in the shady shadows.
Now, knowing that I need to do this and actually doing it are two completely different things. It all comes down to my daily decisions, the little things I choose to do everyday. Study or sleep? Homework or Netflix? Fast food or healthy meal? Hang out with friends or catch up on schoolwork? Allow others' actions to affect my mood, or rise above it and keep my focus? Let negative thoughts and emotions in, or persevere with positivity? Walk away from a dead-end situation, or linger longer because it's comfortable at the time? Live for long-term satisfaction, or for temporary gratification?
Lately, I've been lacking greatly in the motivation and will-power department, which I am sure some of you can relate to. Oftentimes, we lose sight of the long-term goal, what is really best for us, the light at the end of the proverbial tunnel. When it comes to that fork in the road to success, we need to make a choice, to do what is right for us, and our future. We need to let go of our fears and take the the path less traveled, the winding, twisting, rocky road, even though the easy way, the wide, green, grassy, road may seem so much more appealing.
So many of us live for the moment and forget about the future. This may feel good at the time, but that feeling doesn't last. If you want to find true happiness, you need to train yourself to live your life in a way that pushes you to unlock your full potential.
Don't settle for less when you know you are capable of more. Don't shortchange yourself out of fear of the unknown. Don't fall into the trap that you can't be happy unless you have someone else to complete you. YOU alone are in control of your life, your happiness, your daily decisions.
I find myself all too often, making my decisions based on what will make others happy, and putting my own needs on hold. This is something I have been struggling with for a while now, and I am beginning to realize that in order to achieve true happiness, I need to do what is best for me. I need to not rely on others to make me happy, and find joy from within myself. Only then can true happiness be obtained.
Just Another Life Lesson:
#1: Something I have come to realize over the last few months, is that one of the only ways to avoid disappointment, is to stop expecting so much from people. Then, when someone does follow through with that they said they would, you can enjoy it all the more.
#2: Never make assumptions about what others are thinking, without confronting them first. Talking to others instead of that person directly only causes miscommunication and conflict when there may not have been any in the first place.
So until next time, I want to challenge you to think about some of the daily decisions you make that cause you to be unhappy, and some ways you can start relying on yourself for your happiness instead of looking for it in others.
Carpe Diem,
Marian
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